Preparatory C (from 5+). Lesson 5
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Soft Learning and Teaching for The Helicopter Parent
However there was no way she could put them together, to make the word "mama!"
I battled with her. It felt like I was up against a brick wall. Battle, I would like you to notice is the key word here, it defines uncaring, harsh, unnatural teaching.
My daughter was continually 'disappointing' me.
Deep inside I could not come to terms with this. I was frustrated. Why couldn't she understand such simple things? So I started thinking about her genes. I agonized, trying to understand, who in our family was that slow. I had already quarreled with the grandparents and my bitterness about the twists of fate went so deep, that I felt that I was a terribly unhappy person next to this, 'dummy,' I had brought into this world.
In front of me sat a little girl, my very own daughter, who could not understand how to combine two letters to make on syllable. I also saw a monster, who was doing it on purpose so as to sap all my energy and to get to me. If the truth be told, the monster in this situation was me.
When battling with someone you are imposing your opinion about them, on them. To determine whether you are battling with someone or not, is quite simple. It is a particular physical state and the muscles responsible for it are those around the neck and shoulders where your shirt collar goes.
That is where you feel the tension. If you realize this at the right time, you can learn to snap out of it.
This is the position of bird of prey. You don't sit, but you 'hover' over the student or child. You don't take your eyes off him, you are waiting for his reaction. You behave as if the child owes you something and you attempt to regulate his every move. You think you are in control of the situation, but you are in actual fact, invading his/her personal space.
The shadow of your 'wings' deprives her of the sun and the opportunity to grow by herself and get stronger.
You ask questions, but you don't get any answers to them. You endeavor to implant the answers, by the power of thought(make no mistake, tensing your muscles has nothing to do with the transferring of ideas from a distance!)
You can stare at the person, raise or lower your voice, use short phrases or extended sentences. All this will bring no results. And the harder you battle, the more effort you put forth, the quicker you lose your strength and become exhausted.
And all along you are thinking that you are putting your energy into the other person and he is absorbing your strength. That's just an illusion! You pour out your heart, like a soldier pours our his blood in a battle. You are fighting against windmills. This is a futile struggle. This is one of the examples of non-soft teaching. It is harsh. It is in vain. It cripples children.
Soft teaching excludes any encroachment into the student's space. Only when the student himself, invites you into his own personal space, is he ready to ask questions and listen to the answers and then it is time to share your knowledge with him. You sit near the child, lean back on the chair nonchalantly and observe, how he is teaching himself. You watch this calmly. So you don't push the child, he is pushing you. It is he, who is, every now and then disturbing your daydream, and from time to time asking you questions. That is the time to answer them. What is more you could start your answer with the phrase: Oops, why didn't I think of that. Good idea!
BUT HOW CAN THIS BE ACHIEVED?– you may well ask.......The first thing you have to learn–is to observe and listen.
The second, is to be able to ascertain and build on what the child already knows, is able to do and is already doing.
That's the way to go. Not only what they know, but also what they are able to do and enjoy doing well.
So, after observing my daughter for a while, it was easy for me to understand, what her strong points were and what she loves about reading more than anything else.
She knew all the letters and could tell me what they were, without making any mistakes.
She loved doing that. Did she simply adore it when I read her a story?
Yes, she loved listening to stories.
So, the only thing she didn't like and couldn't do was listening and watching at the same time. What I'm saying is, she couldn't understand the mechanical process, when letters become syllables, words, sentences and stories. Can you explain the mechanics of reading words? It's a waste of time.
I suggested to my daughter, that we read a book–together. We sat next to each other, I started to read slowly and with intonation, her favorite story, putting my finger under each letter as I read, and I asked her to follow along.
She began to see how the process of creating syllables, words and sentences worked. The only thing I asked her to do was to watch how I combined the letters into syllables and words. It wasn't difficult for me: I read her books often. She enjoyed it, as she was listening to her favorite story. It was after only a couple of nights of reading this way, when my daughter said to me: Lets read it together?
Remember what you should say at this point? Oops, why didn't I think of that? Good idea! And that was what exactly I said to her.
It was then that my daughter started controlling the process herself: 'I know that word and will read it myself!' Oops, why didn't I think of that. Good idea! Things started to happen. It was an irreversible development.
My daughter came to love reading and that is what we need to happen. During our lives, we are often required to become teachers, formally and informally. When explaining something new to someone, it is good to remember about soft teaching. In gymnastics this approach is straightforward. If it is difficult for you to impart your knowledge to someone else and you are feeling tension in the area of your eagle's 'wings:'
Take a deep breath!
Relax the muscles in your neck and change your mindset from one of a predator to that of a detached bystander.
Be sure to have something to lean back on.
After chilling out, remember to look at the situation as an observer.
Piano exercise: «White Cat - Black Cat»:
Here is the picture how to play the exercise with Right hand:
The picture to play the exercise with your Left hand:
The thumb is a white cat, the middle finger is a black cat.
Press the white keys with your thumb and the black keys with your middle finger.
And let your fingers move on all these keys!
The main thing is to see in time when to press the mouse!
2. "5 fingers" exercise - keep mastering
3. Gentle Piano® -
Альбом First Steps Level 0.1:
Rainbow (Cross Hands Variation): keep working on the exercise after reading on R3, L3 и P3.
4. Piano Hand Position Exercises by Olga Egorova: 'I am painting' - keep practicing
1. Keep working on the Note Alphabet®
Keep a record of the score and check against the previous score, sticking to the same playing times.
Remember that this module develops the child's attentiveness, but it should be given in dosage.
2. Place the cards in order of notes from Do, Re, Mi and Fa.
3. Learn a song from Sol and place the cards forward and backwards:
If your child is developing faster or slower than our plans suggest, we recommend writing to us at firstname.lastname@example.org to start working with our certified specialists.
1. Music sight-reading/sight-singing
Learn to play and sing with the help of the solfeggio pictures of Gentle Piano®- Nursery Songs Primer.
The Farmer in the Dell - R1, R3, L1, L3, P1, P3
2. Piano piece for mastering
Introductory Songs: "French Song" S, after that R1 - R3, left hand L1-L3 and both hands P1-P3
Sample of playing R1:
Sample of playing L:
Sample of playing P:
3. Keep mastering the performance of the Hot Cross Buns with computer and without it.
Gentle Piano®: E. Humperdinck “Slumber Song” find in the Favorite Classics Primer Album
Play R, L и P.
After learning how to play the ТEASER of the “Slumber Song”, listen to the orchestra performance of the piece:
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